Paper hospital gowns suck!

Yesterday I had an appointment with the dreaded gastroenterologist. Of all the kinds of doctors there are, a gastro doc is the one I like the least, even worse than the gynecologist! Gastro guys can't seem to wait to get a look up inside your rear end. They also seem way too happy to do so. I had to go back for a check-up for my ulcers yesterday, and seeing that I had just let him look down my throat less than a month ago, and also do a couple of humiliating examinations then, also, I didn't see why the nurse wanted me to disrobe and put on a crappy paper hospital gown in order to be "examined" again. I tried to argue my way out of it, but she was very forceful and said that he would probably want to check me out again since I was having a bit of digestive trouble still since the gallbladder operation. I reluctantly stripped down and put on this flimsy paper gown. As I sat there waiting for him to come in, I could feel the paper separating in spots, even though I was trying my best not to move too much. Then he comes waltzing in and says "you didn't need to put that on because I just examined you in the hospital." I told him I tried to tell his very bossy nurse that, and he said I should have just told her "no...let the doctor decide." So, did he step out of the room and let me get dressed again? Nope...he just went on and chatted about how I am doing, my diet, how long I need to stay on medicine, etc. By the time the conversation was over, the gown was almost in shreds.

Then today I had to go to the hospital for another CT lung scan. They escorted me to a room and had me put on this hospital gown. The gown they gave me was missing some of the ties to keep it closed in the back, and I had to walk through a waiting area, down a hallway to the CT scan room. Then after the test was done, I had to walk all the way back down the hallway, back through the waiting area to the dressing rooms, all the while trying to keep my hind end and back covered. They could at least give us some kind of robe, or another gown to put on backwards while going from one place to another. In all these decades you would think they could come up with something better for people to wear. I think they like making us feel vulnerable and self-conscious...sort of a control thing to let us know they are in charge and we are at their mercy!

Since it seems I will be spending lots of time with doctors and regular testing, I think I might just make my own hospital gowns...ones that fit so the back closes, and in a nice pretty print and maybe a matching robe to go with!